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Friday Finds

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Hey there!

It’s Friday! I find most things as a parent to be slightly bittersweet – like weekends. Though wonderful in many ways they’re definitely not the same as my pre-kiddo days. And while I am looking forward to spending time with AJ, watching his various sports and maybe squeezing a hike in Sunday morning – I also know that Monday won’t have the same dread that it had pre-kiddo either because… routines, man they are the best. Do you have anything planned this weekend? Have you come up with a way to incorporate the right amount of structure and fluidity into your weekends?

Without further ado here’s another round up of different articles and finds from around the internet this week relating to parenting:

  • Six Screen-Time Studies That Changed My Parenting Approach is a very digestible summary of the studies and how the author used the information. I especially appreciate the last two about reading and acknowledging our own roles.
  • Amazon is coming out with a children’s version of the Echo – along with some parental controls and FreeTime content it comes with a feature that will encourage your child to say ‘please’. I showed this article to my mom and she responded that my dad wants one “so that he can talk better than command… Hey, google.”
  • On A Cup of Jo, the author shares the Three Words That Changed How I Parent:  “Aim for yes.” This is very similar to advice my mom shared with me early in my parenting journey “avoid the power struggle” and was such a good reminder. The examples in the article made me smile and also realize I could definitely say ‘yes’ to a few more things – I read it Monday and can already sense the positive influence it’s having.
  • In this Scary Mommy post,  My Kids Eat Dinner At 3 P.M., And Here’s Why, the writer explains how changing the expected routine has worked for her family. I think it’s important to always do what’s best for your family, not one answer works for everyone – but if you share some of the same struggles I do this might work.
    • From me: While working as a teacher in OKC I incidentally started this routine of grabbing a quick, (often fast food – no shame y’all) small meal for AJ on the way home form school. It completely changed the tone of our afternoons and evenings. He often ate a little bit of the dinner I made myself later in the evening as a second dinner of sorts. By avoiding behavior driven from being “hangry” we were able to keep peace and it was so worth it!
    • From my mom (Dr. Venters): I use to feed the kids the dinner that I had made the day before since they were always hungry earlier than when their dad got home around 7pm. By the time we moved to Denver I just started eating with them at 5-5:30. Kept me from being “hangry” also.
  • BONUS: Having trouble transitioning your little from book read to actually falling asleep? I was recently reminded of these audio Sparkle SleepyTime Stories and wanted to share them with you.
    • When AJ was younger we used these at the end of our bedtime routine; I would rub his back for a couple minutes before leaving the room while it played. The stories are about 12 minutes long and were usually sufficient in slowing down his little brain and sending him off to sleep. I also used them quite successfully in my classroom as a pre-k teacher. I find kiddos really only need to lie still and  be quiet for 5-10 minutes to fall asleep. This worked for us. The other stories were not of much interest to my five year old but I’m thinking of resubscribing to try a few stories for my now nine year old. By the way there’s a similar adult version, Sleep with Me, I haven’t tried it yet though!
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Friday Finds

22
A picture from our hike last weekend, hoping to sneak another one in this weekend!

Hi there and happy Friday!

We hope you have had a great week and are looking forward to the weekend! We’ve linked  a few of our favorite parenting-ish related finds from this week and wanted to share them with you as you go into the weekend.

This video had me doubled over laughing as Seth Meyers describes the birth of his second child… in his apartment lobby.

A beautifully written essay of a small-kindness experienced by a new mother in the midst of a stressful situation. The reader comments are almost as beautiful!

And a fun instagram post from famous author and activist Glennon Doyle as she comments on some of (her own) more relatable aspects of parenting.

 

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Just in case you want to know what the texts of a real live #parentingexpert look like first thing in the morning. Listen to me: this is one thing I actually do know about parenting: IT’S HARD. We must stay strong and sane-ish. We must remember that we are the Bosses of THEM. Kids don’t change their behavior when It Doesn’t work for their parents. Kids change their behavior WHEN It STOPS WORKING FOR THEM. SO- you don’t want to do the dishes cause it’s too hard??? You know what else is hard? Making dinner! You’re on your own! Finding your uniform too hard? You know what else is hard? Driving you to practice! On your own! Forgot your coat and homework? DETENTION’S GONNA BE CHILLY!!!! Let’s love these suckers enough to make sure they learn. Let’s let them fail now – while it’s (relatively) safe. Let. Them. Fail. Let them be sad and mad at us. Better to let them think we suck then keep saving them, thus ensuring that they will actually and forever suck. I repeat- we are the bosses of them. We. Will. Win. We are bigger and wiser and we have the car keys and the money. We can do hard things. Tender Reminder: don’t bring the mom shame please. I swear I will turn this blog around. Less fake, more real. Less making parenting harder by pretending it’s not hard. More room for being human while mothering. Xoxoxox love you kiddos. Good luck this week. If you need me, call someone else. Love you infinity.

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